June 3, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 6-2-2012 - Rerun

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    Elephant Drinks Jacuzzi Dry in Luxury Resort

    May 25, 2010

    A thirsty elephant has been trumped in the mystery of the leaking Jacuzzi.

    Female elephant with the nickname Troublesome was caught on camera draining the jacuzzi by a guest at Etali Safari Lodge in South Africa.

    Staff and owners had been scratching their heads for weeks trying to work out what was the cause of the mystery leak.

    Discovering 'Troublesome' was behind it, the rangers also then realised unexplained marks on the wooded fence were created by her tusks that would get lodged as she drank.

    Elephants can drink up to 200 litres per day and prefer clean water.

    For the original article, go here.


    Blue Tits Make Home in Ashtray

      May 24, 2010

    Most people may think smoking is bad for their health - but not for a family of blue tits.

    The proud feathered parents have set up home in an outdoor ashtray located on a business park in Wallsend, North Tyneside.

    Workers have been downing tools during feeding time to watch the fascinating sight of nature at the Oceana Business Park.

    "I was delighted to hear about the arrival of our newest tenants, it reflects the care and attention we deliver in maintaining the business park's working environment," said Tony Mann, managing director of The Oceana Group.

    "The surrounding greenery and wildlife plays an essential role in the harmonious running of the site.

    "We have a groundsman who keeps Oceana in a pristine condition; and bird tables and friendly feeding areas have been installed for our feathered friends.

    "I believe it all adds to the overall ambience of this beautiful heritage location.

    "We have yet to negotiate a rent for Mr and Mrs Blue Tit but I think for this occasion we can come to some sort of special arrangement."

    A note saying "Please don't use - birds inside!" has been put next to the ashtray as a temporary sign telling people not to put out their lit cigarettes inside.

    For the original article, go here.


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    Camping!

    Tude's bananas!

    Tude likes green guys!


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    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    How many cans of campbells beef veggie soup can be made from the beef of one cow?

    Dad of Tude

    Dear Dad of Tude,
     
    Cows don't make soup.  They've never even been to cooking school.  They eat grass all day long.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why would Donna eat fish lips? Who eats fish lips?

    Donkey

    Dear Donkey,
     
    Donna eats fish lips.  It makes her look brave.  She's not kidding anyone.  She doesn't even like fish.  (It was a birthday cake fish)
     
    Miss Smarty Pants

    Dear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why would Tude kiss green guys? Who kisses green guys?

    Donkey
     
    Dear Donkey,
     
    Tude kisses green guys.  It makes her look spontaneous.  She's not kidding anyone.  She planned it out.  (It was photo shopped)

    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    Onevoice1 is this week's winner!

    She is back after a long absence from xanga, and she just remarried...


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Q: What did the detective duck say to his partner?
    A: I hope we quack this case!

    Q: Why don't ducks fly upside down?
    A: They don't want to quack up!

    Q: What did the duck say to the pharmacist?
    A: Give me some chapstick and put it on my bill!


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Reason To Believe - Wishbone Ash

    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

    New old job still gobbling all my time...

May 27, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 5-26-2012 - Rerun

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    Crows on Cigarette Break Stun Tourists

    May 20, 2010

    A British couple on holiday could not believe their eyes when they spotted a crow flying past carrying a packet of cigarettes.

    Tony and Judie Ellis, from Crowborough, (we're not joking) Sussex, watched in amazement as the crow landed on the roof of a water villa next to theirs and calmly began extracting the cigarettes from the packet.

    As Judie, 53, rushed to get her camera to record the scene on the Maldives two more crows arrived for a fag break and picked up the cigarettes in their beaks.

    Judie said: 'The crow which flew past with the cigarettes seemed to be dishing them out to the others.

    'It was taking the cigarettes out of the packet and putting them on the roo of the water villa. Then the other crows were picking them up. It was amazing that they seemed to have them in their beaks the right way round.'

    The couple, who work as toy inventors, were told after the incident that crows can sometimes be a bit of a nuisance on the islands. They were told that another holidaymaker had a sandwich stolen by a cheeky crow.

    Judie said: 'We have been to the Maldives four times before but never seen any sort of crow behaviour like that. I was lucky to be able to record this on my camera.'

    For the original article, go here.


    Rapping at McDonalds Not Illegal, Decides Judge

    May 20, 2010

    A teenager charged with disorderly conduct after he and some friends rapped their order at a McDonald's drive-thru in Utah has been found not guilty.

    Spenser Dauwalder was cited for disorderly conduct in October last year, after he and his friends imitated a rap from a popular YouTube video that begins 'I need a double cheeseburger and hold the lettuce.'

    Fourth District Judge Thomas Low delivered the Not Guilty verdict on Tuesday in American Fork, about 30 miles south of Salt Lake City. Dauwalder had pleaded not guilty and pledged to fight the citation.

    'We thought, you know, just teenagers out having fun,' Dauwalder told KSL Newsradio last year. 'We didn't think it would escalate to that.'

    The 18-year-old has said employees at the fast-food restaurant told him and his friends they were holding up the line and needed to order or leave. But Dauwalder said no one else was in line. He and his three 17-year-old friends left without buying anything.

    A manager wrote down the car's license plate number and called authorities.

    Dauwalder told The Associated Press on Tuesday he wasn't even the one rapping. He says he was just driving the car.

    'I was pretty scared,' he said. 'I didn't really know what would happen in court. It was kind of intimidating. ... I'm just glad the truth really came out.'

    Kasey Wright, who represented the city, said that although Dauwalder wasn't the one rapping, he was complicit in what was going on. He added that the case was never about the rapping, but it was about disruption of the business and alleged threatening behavior toward a restaurant employee.

    But Wright said the judge ultimately found the activity did not rise to the level of disorderly conduct. 'We were disappointed in the ruling,' Wright said.

    For the original article, go here.


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    The socks match says Spazzz!

    Funnelcake says Tude!

    Tude lost all her cows!


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why when I was little and counted cows there were more cows than cemeteries and as an adult there are more cemeteries than cows? How can I count cows if I keep losing them?

    Signed,
    Still Cowculating
     
    Dear Cowculator,
     
    Just count all the legs you can see and divide by four.  That should be accurate.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

    Signed,
    Cornfused

    Dear Cornfused,
     
    It is simply because Jimmy did like singing he just didn't have an ear for music and his voice usually cracked.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    DingDongDongBat is this week's winner!

    Because she could not find a fool this week!


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and set that in front of his wife. The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap.

    The young man decided to ask if they would allow him to purchase another meal for them so that they didn't have to split theirs.

    The old gentleman said, "Oh no. We've been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared, 50/50."

    The young man then asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she replied, "It's his turn with the teeth."


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Wishbone Ash - Persephone


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

    Underwater with my old job for a new company - if that makes any sense!

May 22, 2012

May 20, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 5-20-2012

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    The Age-Old Question Is Finally Answered: Donkeys Aren't Stubborn 

    May 13, 2012

    It is a question that has vexed the finest academic minds of the past two millennia – but are donkeys and mules really that stubborn?

    Now a university has hitched its wagon to the debate in a two-day conference taking apart centuries of asinine conjecture about ‘donkey, mule and hinny cultures worldwide’.

    Ben Hart of the Donkey Sanctuary posited the theory that ‘evolutionary histories of donkeys and mules’ had led to behaviour that has been misunderstood and contributed to the reputation for being stubborn.

    ‘The donkey’s behaviour is commonly misunderstood principally because their behaviour is compared to that of the horse, rather than viewed as a separate species,’ he said in Stubborn Donkey Or Smart Ass? at the School of Oriental and African Studies at the University of London.

    ‘By looking at the domesticated donkeys’ evolutionary niche and the behaviour of both free-living donkeys and domesticated donkeys, it is possible to explain the different behaviours of donkeys and to lay to rest their reputation for stubbornness and their misrepresentation as small horses with big ears.’

    Donkeys have been associated with stubbornness since before Christ.  Ancient Greek epic poet Homer and fabulist Aesop labelled the creatures as ‘stupid, servile and stubborn’.

    For the original article, go here!


    Sammy The Squirrel Learns To Bash The Keys On Toy Piano

    May 15, 2012

    He lives in a music studio so it’s no surprise Sammy the squirrel seems nuts about music - the bushy tailed Bach often bounces along the keys of his miniature toy piano, bashing them with his paws.

    Abandoned by his mother, Sammy has grown up around music after he was rescued by piano teacher Shirley Higton and her husband Steve two years ago.

    Mrs Higton, 55, said: ‘He has learned to press the keys which is something he could not do when he first got the piano.

    ‘Sammy’s favourite notes are those his paws happen to land on, and it is all a case of pot luck. He likes listening to bouncy music, such as a boogie woogie, but I don’t think Jools  Holland has any worries.’

    His interest is believed to have started when he heard the Higton children’s piano lessons at the family’s home in Bridlington, Yorkshire.

    ‘He likes to jump on the keyboard and chase their fingers as they play,’ Mrs Higton said.

    But, despite his avant-garde ‘playing’ style, the rocking rodent is a bit of a connoisseur who ‘has a habit of nodding off when the students play soft classical music’.

    Nutcracker suite

    The First Nut Is The Deepest - Rod Stewart
    Furry Tail Of New York - The Pogues
    One Rodent In Time - Whitney Houston
    Forget About Drey - Dr Dre and Eminem
    Nut Fever - Bee Gees
    It Must Be Nuts - Madness
    Nutbush City Limits - Tina Turner
    Great Fur Balls Of Fire - Jerry Lee Lewis
    Nutting Like The Real Thing - Marvin Gaye
    Nice One Squirrel - Tottenham Hotspur FC

    For the original article, go here!



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    So how long did it take for two fools to notice they were sunning under falling coconuts?

    I suppose it could have been worse?



    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPants
    Dear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why do teeth only hurt when the dentist's office is closed or you can't go?

    Donkey

    Dear Donkey,
     
    You can go to the dentist's office when it is closed.  This is a free country.  If you want to go to the dentist's office and 3 in the morning, there is no law that says you can't do that.  So you take your sore teeth to the dentist's office as soon as they hurt.  Now, if you want to see the DENTIST, you should wait and take your teeth when the dentist will be at the office.  That is just a bit of friendly advice.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants



    MissSmartyPants
    Dear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why are donkeys so stubborn?

    Your Favorite,
    Spazzzzzzzzzz
     
    Dear Spazzzzzzzzzz,
     
    They aren't stubborn, they just have very firm ideas about how they want to do or not do things.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    @BeadBrat is this weeks winner.

    Just because!






    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Jon and Dan are in  a mental institution which has an annual contest that picks two of the best patients and gives them two questions. If they answer correctly, they are released.

    Jon is called into the doctor's office first. The doctor says, "Jon, what would happen if I poked out one of your eyes?"

    Jon says, "I'd be half blind."

    "That's correct. What would happen if I poked out both your eyes?"

    "I'd be completely blind." The doctor tells him that he is free to go. On Jon's way out he tells Dan the questions and answers.

    The doctor asks Dan, "What would happen if I cut off one of your ears?"

    Dan says, "I'd be half blind."

    The doctor, slightly puzzled, continues, "What would happen if I cut off both your ears?"

    "I'd be completely blind."

    "Dan, how can you explain that you'd be blind?" asks the doctor.

    "Well," replies Dan, "my hat would fall over my eyes."


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Vince Jones - Don't Worry About A Thing


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Report it to the Donkey! Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Send them to the Donkey!

May 15, 2012

  • Going Going Gone

    Tudesday2

    Is timing everything? That's what they say. I always feel like my hearing is on time delay. So often, just as I recognize the best things in life - they vanish! Poof!

    He who hesitates is lost - but look before you leap!

    Which is it?

    Both?

    Maybe I should go think about this a while?

    I bet I will miss something while I am thinking!

    So...

    Is "time the fire in which we burn"?

    Or...

    Is "time is a companion who goes with us on the journey and reminds us to cherish every moment, because it will never come again..."

    And which Star Trek movie did these quotes come from?

    I dunno!

    Anyway, I think you should smile at someone today, and tell someone you love them, because you might not get another chance. You never know.


    Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

    I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.

    Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

    What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?

    Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Eric Clapton - Tears in Heaven


    How is your timing?

May 13, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times - Mother's Day Rerun

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    Fur Seal Caught Trying to Seduce Penguin

    Penguin May 5, 2008

    An Antarctic fur seal has been observed trying to mate with a King Penguin.

    The South African-based scientists who witnessed the incident say it is the most unusual case of mammal mating behavior yet known.

    The incident, which lasted for 45 minutes and was caught on camera, is reported in the Journal of Ethology.

    The bizarre event took place on a beach on Marion Island, a sub-Antarctic island that is home to both fur seals and King Penguins.

    Why the seal attempted to have sex with the penguin is unclear. But the scientists who photographed the event speculate that it was the behavior of a frustrated, inexperienced young male seal.

    Equally, it might be been an aggressive, predatory act; or even a playful one that turned sexual.

    "At first glimpse, we thought the seal was killing the penguin," says Nico de Bruyn, of the Mammal Research Institute at the University of Pretoria, South Africa.

    For the original article, go here!


    Editorial Comment: I always wonder who is paying the scientists to record this stuff! Obviously, it was the tuxedo that did the trick!


    Missing Cat Found on Internet

    Tuesday, May 6, 2008

    A cat who has been missing from a Cornish village for eight months has been found – with help from across the Atlantic.

    Jerry was spotted by a US woman watching a webcam. She saw him most evenings, bedding down on the doorstep of a hotel in Polperro and posted a message on a village forum.

    'Now we are trying to catch him there - but he is proving a bit elusive,' said Jerry's owner, 30-year-old Abbi Rendell.

    'But at least I know he is safe and well.'

    For the original article, go here!


    Editorial Comment: So let me get this straight... A lady in the U.S. was watching the door of a hotel in Polperro on a webcam nightly? What was she looking for?


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    HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!

     TO THE BEST DEN MOTHER THAT A GROUP OF FOOLS COULD EVER HAVE!


    TONS OF LOVE!

    SPAZZZ, TUDE and the Den of Fools!



    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPants
    Dear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why is Tude's Belly Button green? Is it jealous of something?

    Anatomically wondering

    Dear Anatomically Wondering,

    It is because she doesn't have a belly zipper. A belly button was all that they could find on her. Of course it is jealous. Everyone knows zippers are better than buttons.

    Miss Smarty Pants



    MissSmartyPants
    Dear Miss Smarty Pants,

    HEY!! Donkey stole my choclate!! Why did he do THAT???

    Devastated Spazzz

    Dear Spazzz,

    That was a whole year ago! You should check the date. I know that Donkey has given you chocolate since then. It was your brothers machine in the first place. I know how you are with wires, you should consider rewiring that machine to go back in time and keep your chocolate. Donkey is a good engineer. He could help.

    Miss Smarty Pants






    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Why do we go under over-passes and over under-passes?

    If the plural of "mouse" is "mice, shouldn't the plural of "house" be "hice"?

    Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

    If a train station is where a train stops, what is a workstation?

    Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Vince Jones - Don't Worry About A Thing


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Report it to the Donkey! Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Send them to the Donkey!

May 8, 2012

May 6, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 05-06-2012

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    'Mystery' Blue Sheep Appear Outside Germany's Schwerin Castle

      May 4, 2012

    This unusual flock of sheep are doing their best to stand out from the crowd after being spotted in Germany painted head-to-toe in dark blue paint.

    It's in a sheep's DNA to follow the crowd but it appears this collection of colourful characters, seen here outside Schwerin Castle, want to break the mould.

    While the true legend of the Golden Fleece has been shrouded in mystery for thousands of years, this tale may have a slightly more simpler explanation

    The herd of blue plastic sheep were created by German artists Rainer Bonk and Bertamaria Reetz as part of a mobile art installation.

    Artificial blue sheep have been popping up in towns, cities and field across the world to promote 'tolerance and solidarity'.

    Every sheep is indistinguishable from the next and, according to the artists, help transcend the peaceful message that 'all are equal - everyone is important'.

    The project has been touring the globe for over three years, stopping off in more than 50 cities along the way.

    A blue sheep is left behind in each city they visit where it remains as a peace ambassador.

    For the original article, go here.


    Britain's Most Vicious Swan Mr Asbo Is Removed From The River Cam

    May 3, 2012

    A violent swan nicknamed Mr Asbo has been removed from the River Cam following a spate of attacks on rowers, canoeists and other river users.

    His reign of terror in Cambridge finally came to an end this week after River Cam officials applied for an emergency license to allow them to legally remove him in a bid to protect river users.

    He was taken to a secret location over 60 miles away following a secret operation involving a team of brave volunteers.

    The feathered bully had regularly chased members of the public up and down the river, attacked rowers and capsized canoes.

    Worried officials believed Mr Asbo posed a serious threat to public health and safety and decided to finally remove the notorious bird from the stretch of river after the attacks intensified.

    Frightened rowers complained after being left with cuts and bruises following the unprovoked attacks and a large number are believed to have supported the bird's removal from the river,  popular with Cambridge University students.

    John Wakefield, deputy manager for local river authority the Cam Conservators said the swan had become 'abnormally aggressive'.

    'Over the last few years this swan has been behaving particularly abnormally aggressively by swan standards,' Mr Wakefield told the Daily Mail.

    'There has been a concern he or his mate would be injured or a rower would be seriously injured. We have had lots of complaints from rowers about his behaviour.

    'His mate hadn't hatched any eggs yet so it was deemed appropriate to move the birds at this stage in the season and thee is still time for them to hatch a brood in their new home.

    'Another group of swans has already moved into his territory but we hope they will be less aggressive.'

    However the decision to remove him in the middle of the breeding season has been criticised by former river resident Robin Middleton.

    'What right do they have to take him? He is a very intelligent swan and this is despicable,' he said.

    A spokesman for Natural England confirmed the swan had been moved because of health and safety concerns.

    'We have always agreed he should be moved because it has been difficult for public health and safety,' he said.

    'It is nesting season, but his behaviour was getting worse.'

    Another river user added: 'We're relieved he has finally gone.'

    For the original article, go here.


    Editor's Note: In the United Kingdom, an ASBO or Anti-Social Behaviour Order, is a civil order made against a person who has been shown, on the balance of evidence, to have engaged in anti-social behaviour. - wikipedia

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    Sugar Bunny

    Spazzzzz is a friend of mine,
    She resembles Frankenstein.

    One day she ate a fig,
    Now she looks like Porky Pig.

    Spazzzzzz!!!!


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why did Dr. Seuss talk that way?

    Donkey
     
    Dear Donkey,
     
    He had talking classes with a mouse.  Classes were held inside a house.  There was a fox inside a box, brought in by Gertrude McFuzz.  She wasn't very happy, really she never was.  Horton the elephant, took classes too, with both of the fishes, the red and the blue.  The Wickersham brothers, with all of their sass, monkeyed around and interruped that class.  Poor Dr. Seuss wasn't sure what to do, so he styled his language after a Who.  The Who, from Whoville, always knew what to say and THAT is why Dr. Seuss talks that way.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    I heard that Pythagoras had a theorem and I was wondering whether he ever got over it, and if there is a cure now. I just want to know what I should do if I ever have a theorem. I know you will have the answer! I just had shingles and I don't want any other weird stuff!

    Your favorite,
    Spazzzzzzzzz
     
    Dear Spazzzzzzzzz,
     
    I have seen proof of this theorem.  Mostly you would catch it in a math room.  You could triangulate it's location if you really wanted to, but I suggest you don't mulitply all your efforts there.  The best thing to do if you find yourself dealing with a theorem is to use a pencil as a solvant and try not to be squared away in the corners.  Best wishes!
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    Cider is so smart!


    FoolOfTheWeek

    @Music_Turned_Human

    For waking up at midnight and taking her morning meds that kept her up all night.


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    A man went to visit  his doctor. "Doc, my arm hurts bad. Can you check it out please?" the man pleads.

    The doctor rolls up the man's sleeve and suddenly hears the arm talk. "Hello, Doctor" says the arm. "Could you lend me twenty bucks please? I'm desperate!"

    "Aha!" says the doctor.

    "I see the problem. Your arm is broke!"


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    I Feel Fine- The Beatles


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

May 5, 2012

  • Gardyloo Dan - Modern Plumbing, etc.

    Recently, the @thetheologianscafe has done a series of posts on topics relating to cleanliness.

    Some of these posts have included:

    I would appear Dan has become obsessed with cleanliness, either that, or running out of things to post on. I note, however, that it was not until the latest post that her got around to posting a woman in her underwear:

    Before the advent of modern indoor plumbing, bathing habits throughout the industrial world were much different. I would venture to guess that only in the last two thirds of the 20th century have the practices of taking a shower or bath daily, or wearing a clean set of clothes daily became practical for the average American.

    Remember this word: Gardyloo.

    "Gardy-loo" comes from the French "gardez l'eau" ("watch out for the water") and was shouted in England in the days before modern sewage facilities to warn people on the street when people dumped their waste out the window. - Gardy Loo

    So, before modern plumbing, which has not been around that many centuries, the contents of chamber pots

    (which were used in place of toilets) and the contents of wash basins

    (which were used in place of bathroom sinks)

    were tossed daily into the streets below. The only warning those passing by in the street got was the phrase: "Gardy Loo" being yelled out the window.

    So while many of us may take a daily bath these days, it was not practically possible to take a full bath or shower not so long ago. Water had to be carried to the house. Water had to be heated on a stove - usually not an electric stove. In addition, most people worked more than a 40 hour work week. It was common to work half days on Saturdays. That half day off gave the opportunity to go haul in water for the weekly bath. In addition, a tub full of water is very heavy. Generally, everyone in the family used the same bath water.

    On a daily basis, there might be time for a sponge bath, using something like the pitcher and bowl pictured above. It was recommended people wash their faces and hands once a day.

    I imagine that most people elected to use chamber pots only at night. The healthy would go outside and use the outhouse.

    Speaking of which, toilet paper as we know it today, has not been around all that long.

    "In 1935, Northern Tissue advertised "splinter-free" toilet paper. Yep, you read that right; early paper production techniques sometimes left splinters embedded in the paper. And you thought you had it tough!" - History of Toilet Paper

    It was common to find old Sears catalogs, or newspapers in outhouses, to be used in lieu (pun intended) of toilet paper.

    Oh! And let's not even talk about how long the sanitary napkin has been around. Not that long.

    And when it came time to doing laundry - again water had to be hauled - and without electricity - there were not washing machine and dryer to throw things into.

    There was a washtub and clothesline. Sometimes if you were lucky, you had a wringer with a crank! This picture is from the 1930's.

    So now many of us in the industrialized portions of the world have modern indoor bathroom facilities, and washing machines, and dryers. We can take a bath or shower daily - and wash our clothes often. But let's not fool ourselves. These things are luxuries. I would venture to guess that MOST of the population of the world does NOT have access to such things. A lot of the world smells a lot differently than it does here in a large portion of the U.S.

    So - Gardyloo Dan! Gardyloo!

May 2, 2012

  • Heroes - Barbara Jordan

    Barbara Jordan

    Barbara Charline Jordan (February 21, 1936 – January 17, 1996) was an American politician and a leader of the Civil Rights movement. She was the first African American elected to the Texas Senate after Reconstruction and the first southern black female elected to the United States House of Representatives. She received the Presidential Medal of Freedom, among numerous other honors. On her death she became the first African-American woman to be buried in the Texas State Cemetery. - wikipedia


    Who are your heroes?