From @Seedsower
Doc is this week's winner! Something about a bloody hand and going out to dinner?
Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey! |
Month: September 2013
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The Sunday Donkey Times 9-29-2013
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The Sunday Donkey Times 9-22-2013
Pets Eat When ‘Emotionally Distressed’ Just Like Us, Say Experts
September 22, 2013Is your pet putting on weight? It may be eating to quell emotional distress just as humans do, say experts.Overeating may not be a psychological issue that is solely the preserve of human beings, with vets claiming in new research that cats and dogs are disposed to ‘emotional eating’ too.The assertions were made in a new edition of the Journal of Veterinary Behavior, which looked at the eating habits of a range of animals as well as humans.It said that eating can be seen as a ‘coping mechanism’ for pets, too, to combat stress and depression, in light of the animals consuming food when they weren’t even hungry.
While the study said that obesity rates can be as much as 25 per cent in cats and 45 per cent in dogs, one expert has said that putting the creatures on a diet could possibly worsen the situation.
‘The bottom line is that there is a ton of evidence in humans and animals like rodents that stress induced eating, or emotional eating is a very real thing and contributes to obesity, so we should be looking at it in pet animals,’ Dr McMillan from the Best Friends Animal Society told The Daily Telegraph.
‘If this is a major factor in our pet animals, then the standard approach, by simply yanking away their food, is very misguided and potentially harmful.’
For the original article, go here!
Runaway Potbellied Pig Captured By Police In Austin, Texas
September 18, 2013The usual suspects were nowhere to be seen when police in Texas received reports of an unusual visitor wandering the streets of the state’s capital.
Officers from Austin Police Department were left bemused when they were dispatched to deal with an errant pig drifting along the road.
The little porker had apparently escaped from its owner before attracting the attention of concerned residents and motorists.
Being more used to dealing with hardened criminals, officer Jason Hallmark made light work of catching the pig and bundling it into the back of his patrol car.
Despite the 30lb making a mess in the backseat of, officer Hallmark appeared to strike up a rapport with the piglet.
‘Hey! Why did you poop in my car?’ he asks at one point.
After being taken to Austin Animal Centre for a check-up, the fugitive pig was later reunited with its thankful owners.
For the original article and a video clip, go here!
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,
If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
Donkey
Dear Donkey,
They say it because they want to look smart, but really they just look foolish. Sometimes, though, they say it to reinforce a concept. It goes without saying that parents love their kids, but they continue to tell them every day. As if wearing rainbow jackets and socks doesn't say I love you enough, people still say the words.
Miss Smarty Pants
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,Why do people say I wear mismatched socks?
Your Favorite,
Spazzzz
Dear Spazzz,Your socks are magnificent. I have a secret love of socks actually. I prefer holiday socks though. Socks for every holiday. You would find it an interesting tidbit to know that I do not own Thanksgiving socks even though I've spent years looking for them. I think sock manufacturers must not know how that impacts my holiday sock collection. Your socks are not mismatched. They just reflect the many moods you might encounter in a day.
Miss Smarty Pants
From @Seedsower
I Don't Know is this week's winner!
Well, that's the way it was! Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!
Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
Today's YouTube Tune
Please Mr. Postman - The Beatles
Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!
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Double You (W)
Years ago, when I was in grade school, I had a classmate whose name was Eddie – short for Edward. Eddie was a little slower than the rest of us and also had a bit of a speech impediment. He would stutter when saying certain words and letters. Of course, kids being what they are, Eddie was teased a lot. This really didn’t help his confidence much, but he was placed in mainstream classes and that just came with the territory. But this really isn’t about Eddie, but about all of us. Its just that this true story about Eddie illustrates the point so well.
Columbus Elementary School, Edwardsville, Illinois
In third grade, our teacher often held class-wide spelling bees. All of the class would stand up to begin with and be given words to spell in turn, and with each failed spelling another student would sit down until the winner was the only student still standing. The student before Eddie failed to spell his word correctly, and so the word was given to Eddie. The word began with the letter “W”. “W” was a letter Eddie had great difficulty with, but Eddie knew how to spell the word, so he was excited. He started out as usual saying “Doub, doub, doub, doub, doub…” Finally he said, “I can’t say that letter!” So the teacher asked him to write it on the board. So Eddie went up to the board and began to write the first lines of the letter “W”. He stopped, and turned around with a confused look on his face and said without missing a beat nor uttering a stutter: “I forgot how to write a double you!” The class cracked up – and so did Eddie! Although I think his feelings were hurt again – he played along – because I think he was as surprised as everyone else – and now he knew that he could say the letter “W”.
The school was just a few blocks from the theatre – see Old Movie Theatre
The point is, that saying the letter “W” was something that Eddie could do. Something in his head had convinced him that he could not say the letter “W” – and each time he tried to say it – he began his old pattern. I think most of us are like that in some ways. We have many gifts and talents that we do not recognize – and what is holding us back is not our basic abilities – but our belief that we can’t do it.
Maybe this Kangaroo will lend me his ear?
“Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ear!”
Donkey Nuzzles!
What is YOUR "W"?
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The Sunday Donkey Times 9-15-2013
David v Goliath: Ninja Rabbit Fights Back Against Leopard
September 11, 2013The odds of survival were rather slim for this unlucky rabbit after coming face-to-face with a leopard and two tigers in eastern China.
As the predator approached, the white bunny had to spring into action to avoid being devoured for lunch. With the big cat going in for the kill, the ninja rabbit hopped over his head, giving him a cheeky kick as it went.
The luckless rabbit was used by keepers during a test of the five-month-old’s wild natural instincts at a wildlife park in Qingdao, Shandong province.
The test is part of the park’s body examination procedure on recent born tigers, lions and leopards, according to local media. Despite the rabbit’s valiant efforts to avoid the hungry predator, we fear it is unlikely the critter managed to pull off a miracle escape when it was later pitted against two baby tigers.
For the original article, go here.
Skateboarding Goat Happie Could Be The Most Amazing Animal On The Planet
September 11, 2013Meet the record-breaking goat who likes to get around on four wheels.
Happie could be the most talented animal on the planet after learning how to skateboard, although that dog from Britain’s Got Talent might disagree.
The gifted animal has just set a new world record for the furthest distance on a skateboard ever by a goat – 36m in 25 seconds.
Owner Melody Cooke regularly takes Happie to her local car park in Fort Myers, Florida, where the goat has spent hours honing her amazing talent.‘
She figured out how to get on and “woah” this is amazing the goat can skateboard. Let me see how far I can go with this,’ explained Ms Cooke.‘After she became a Guinness World Record skateboarder, she’s become a bit of a diva.’
Happie’s record-breaking achievement has made it into the latest edition of the world’s best-selling book, Guinness World Records 2014.
For the original article with a video link, go here.
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,
Why does "infatuation" rhyme with "graduation" and "degradation" and "insinuation"?
Donkey
Dear Donkey,
The fascination this question brings to me reminds me why education is so important. There must be a cessation of silly questions from the younger generation. Of course that observation won't bring any realization due to excessive recreation. I hope that brings you a bit of revelation.
Miss Smarty Pants
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,Why don't people send me chocolate in the summer?Your Favorite,
Spazzzz
Dear Spazzz,Because it is hot and chocolate gets all sorts of melty.
Miss Smarty Pants
Dear Donkey,
I was perusing world records so that I could locate my record for best answers to every question ever given and I ran across a picture of one of your little relatives. That is just sweet. Look here.
Miss Smarty Pants
From @Seedsower
@Spazmom40 is this week's winner!
Something about going home on a red eye?
Well, that's the way it was!
Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!
Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day
Q: What did the guitar say to the guitarist?
A: Pick on someone your own size!Q: What’s the definition of a minor second?
A: Two lead guitarists playing in unison.Q: What do you call two guitarists playing in unison?
A: Counterpoint.Q: How do you get a guitar player to play softer?
A: Give him a sheet of music.
Today's YouTube Tune
Roll Over Beethoven - The Beatles
Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!
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Themes - I Want Themes!
Actually - I just want to add stuff to my sidebar!
That would be a good first start!
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Kicking @ss!
Some days life kicks your ass!
And some days your @ss kicks back!
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Xanga Photos Are Here!
Woo Hoo!
On your dashboard, on the left, there is a new menu item labeled "Xanga Photos"!
You can see what is in your old xanga photo library from there!
Fanatstic!
Go Xanga 2.0!
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The Sunday Donkey Times 9-8-2013
Labrador Adopts Orphaned Baby Squirrel – Pair Become Best Friends Forever
September 5, 2013Could this be the cutest and most unlikely animal friendship yet?A kind-hearted Labrador and an orphaned squirrel have become inseparable after striking up an unlikely friendship.Caring canine Hoss brought the squirrel and his sister, who were named Jack and Jill, back to his owner’s home after they were apparently abandoned by their mother.‘My lab found an orphaned baby squirrel a few weeks ago. He put him in his mouth and brought him unharmed to us. Now they are buds,’ explained Reddit user Ithink_therefore_iam, who posted a cute picture of the pair online.
While Jill died after just a few days, Jack is being hand-reared and is set to be released back into the wild in the next few weeks.
‘We have had Jack for three weeks and still have a few more weeks with him,’ explained the Reddit user.
‘I’m building a cage for him this weekend that he’ll be introduced to at some point once he’s solely on solid food.
‘It’ll be something in my backyard that will always be open and he can come back if he wants.’
For the original article, go here.
Fred the Ferret Goes On Hour-Long Rampage Attacking Residents in Block of Flats
September 5, 2013A ferret terrorised residents in a block of flats when it went on a biting spree.The 20cm (8in) runaway, nicknamed Fred, snapped at Merrell Smith for almost an hour.
Her neighbour and another person were also bitten before Fred was lured into a cat box with a piece of ham.
However, he also nipped the RSPCA officer who collected him.
Ms Smith, from Chilwell, Nottinghamshire, said: ‘I heard my neighbour calling me and when I opened the door there was this ferret, outside my door running around.
‘I was talking to my neighbour about what to do when it just literally went for me. I tried to shoo it away but it just kept going for me and going for me.
‘This went on for about an hour or so. It just kept trying to bite me. It was horrible and my ankle is painful to walk on.’
She suffered puncture wounds to her skin and had to be treated by paramedics.
Ms Smith also required a tetanus jab to ensure she wasn’t infected.
Commenting on the incident, a RSPCA spokesman said the animal charity was currently searching for Fred’s owner.
‘The ferret did not appear to have been handled much and was not very friendly,’ he said.
‘It is currently in our care and we would appeal to anyone who has any information regarding who has lost the ferret to get in touch.’
For the original article, go here.
Toothpick World?
Spazzz told me not to forget something - but I forgot what it was!
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,
Xanga 2.0 is here! It's alive! Where was it before it was here?
Donkey
Dear Donkey,
Your question reminds me of the story of Dr. Frankenstein and his monster by Mary Shelly. Like the monster in the book, the creators of Xanga worked long and tirelessly to create something they could bring to life after the death of something they loved (the old Xanga). If you haven't read the book by Mary Shelly, it is a classic. Go check it out at your library.
Miss Smarty Pants
Dear Miss Smarty Pants,Why does Donkey like pocket watches? Don't Donkey's have enough tics already? You don't think this question will tick him off do you?
Your Favorite,
Spazzzz
Dear Spazzz,So you are implying Donkey has pockets. That is ridiculous. Donkey's don't wear pants. Look at all the pictures of him, there are no pants. He certainly doesn't need something to watch his non existent pockets.
Miss Smarty Pants
@Donkey_Guy_10 is this week's winner!
Well, that's the way it was!Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!
Dead Turkey Jokes of the DayA small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said ‘No change yet’.Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. A prisoner’s favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
Today's YouTube Tune
Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!
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WARNING! Posters can change your comments to say whatever they want!
Dear Xanga:
Why are posters allowed to change the content of what their commenters say? I think a poster should be able to delete comments - but not CHANGE them and have them still attributed to the original commenter.
Donkey
September 25, 2013
