September 23, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 9-23-2012

    DonkeyTimesBanner

    Gymnastic Goat Stands on Top Of Shetland Pony at Acrobatic Farm

    September 22, 2012

    A gymnastic goat and a Shetland pony have formed an unlikely double act with a routine they perform regularly at their acrobatic animal farm.

    Their bizarre performance, which involves Catkin the goat running and leaping four foot onto the back of Shetland pony Henry, is now an everyday occurrence.

    Show-off Catkin amazed her owner Karen Newman when she spontaneously jumped on top of her farmyard friend - who appears more than happy to accommodate the agile animal.

    The duo, who have become inseparable, have be known to stay in the piggyback position for up to 20 minutes at their Halifax, West Yorkshire, home.

    It usually gives Ms Newman, who admits she is no longer fazed by the feat, more than enough time to rush back home and grab a camera.

    'Henry and Catkin get on really well,' explained the 35-year-old. 'I don't have a clue why Catkin jumps onto Henry's back, maybe it's some sort of game.'

    She added: 'They stay stationary like that for quite a while - sometimes 15 or 20 minutes - easily long enough for me to go back to the house and get my camera, then get back to the field.

    'I suppose it must seem a bit strange to people without goats but to me it's quite normal now.'

    Henry was bought six years ago as a companion for the animal lover's 45-year-old horse Whiskey.

    However it appears to share more of an interest in gymnastics with another four-legged friend

    For the original article, go here.


    Cat Named Tuxedo Stan Campaigns to Become Mayor in Canadian Town

    September 19, 2012

    A clever cat with a penchant for politics has launched a campaign to run as mayor in the Canadian town of Halifax.

    The opinionated feline, known as Tuxedo Stan, is campaigning to 'improve the welfare of felines in the Halifax Municipal Region because neglect isn't working'.

    As the nominated candidate of the Tuxedo Party, Stan hopes to raise awareness about the large number of stray cats in the region.

    The furry feline hopes his motto of 'A chicken in every pot & a litter box in every house' can help win the support of locals.

    His campaign has even caught the attention of Halifax councillor candidate Waye Mason, who wrote on Twitter: 'I'm just glad I'm not running against Tuxedo Stan. He is everywhere these days.'

    Thousands of Tuxedo Stan fans have registered their support for the black and white kitty, currently featured on a poster campaign across Halifax, on his official Facebook page.

    'I feel very fortunate to live in Catopia,' he is quoted as saying on the social networking site. 'I've never known hunger, cold or abuse. I sleep in a warm, cosy bed every night.

    'I get to play in a safe fenced yard every day. Unfortunately, there are cats all over the world who aren't so lucky.

    'You can help by donating money or time to a local rescue group.'

    Although municipal law bans animals from holding office, it hasn't stopped Stan in his mission to improve animal welfare and become the unofficial mascot of Halifax.

    He follows in the paw steps of Stubbs the cat who celebrated his 15th year as the honorary mayor of Alaska town Talkeetna earlier this year.

    The feline is one of the longest-serving mayors in America, with his huge popularity worldwide helping boost tourism in the area.

    For the original article, go here.


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    Put a muffler on it Donkey!

    Totally Tude! More Full Frontal Tudity!


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    How does a story get to be far fetched?

    Donkey
     
    Dear Donkey,
     
    When a story is thrown WAY OUT there and a reporter has to try to bring it back, that makes it far fetched.

    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Halloween is coming again. I was wondering what I should go as this year! One year I was the Geico Pig! Should I pick a different animal or a different insurance company?

    Your Favorite,
    Spazzzzz
     
     
    Dear Spazzzzzz,
     
    Well if you switch insurances companies it should only take about 15 minutes and then it should save you 15% on the cost of your costume.  However, that was Geico, so switching insurances, like a good neighbor, is best left in the good hands of someone progressive enough to help you switch.   You could always go as Snoopy, because that costume would ROCK!

    Miss Smarty Pants


    If @Seedsower doesn't steal your heart with her pictures - then you don't know @Seedsower.


    FoolOfTheWeek

    @DingDongDingBat is this week's winner!

    Something about a passport?

    Oh! Wait! @DingDongDingBat say:

    @Still_groovy is the winner because she did and actual post!


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    A Texas Aggie bought an a.m. radio and it took him a month to find out he could listen to it at night.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Queen of Torture - Wishbone Ash


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

September 16, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 9-16-2012

    DonkeyTimesBanner

    Relaxed Feline Sitting On A Wall Could Be The Coolest Cat On The Planet

    September 11, 2012

    First there was the frog sitting on a bench like a human and now we have a feline sitting upright on a wall that may just be the coolest cat on the planet.

    Looking out across an open green playing field, the chilled out moggy appears content as it relaxes on the side of a wall.

    While most of our fluffy, four-legged friends usually rely on all four paws to keep their balance, this cool cat appears to need only two.

    With its back legs dangling over the side of the wall, the unusual cat manages to keep its balance leaning over some metal railings.

    The sleepy brown and white furball appears unperturbed by the presence of a camera capturing the astonishing moment as it struggles to keep its eyes open.

    It has racked up thousands of hits on video-sharing website YouTube in just a matter of days, receiving hundreds of likes.

    One amused user wrote: 'This is so cute!!!!'

    Earlier this year a video entitled 'frog sitting on a bench like a human' became an overnight internet hit and has since been viewed over 9.6million times on YouTube.

    Cool Cat Video Here

    For the original article, go here.


    Live Frog Found in Waitrose Salad Bag in Hampshire

    September 12, 2012

    A mother was left hopping mad after her daughter found a live frog in a bag of salad she bought from her local Waitrose in Hampshire.

    Mum-of-three Christina Carrington was left feeling 'repulsed' having already tucked into the mixed leaf selection for lunch before putting the bag back in the fridge.

    Her youngest daughter, Daniela Toale, was preparing dinner when she spotted the croaky critter staring back at her hours later through the salad's plastic wrapping.

    'I'm absolutely mortified to think I ate the leaves at lunch time when clearly the frog had been in the same bag,' said Mrs Carrington.

    The palm-sized amphibian had amazingly survived despite being trapped in the plastic bag for more than 24 hours.

    Waitrose apologised for the 'isolated' incident after sending a member of staff to pick up the frog.

    'We are very sorry for the distress caused,' a Waitrose spokesman said.

    'All our bagged salad is thoroughly washed and we have steps in place to check each product before packaging.

    'Although this is an isolated incident, we're investigating with our suppliers as to how this happened.

    'We are also taking steps to minimise the chances of this happening again.'

    Waitrose added that the frog was 'fine' following its ordeal and the supermarket chain is currently seeking advice from the RSPCA on finding it a suitable home.

    For the original article, go here.


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    Its unbearbale Spazzzz!

    Kathy and Tude - friends forever!


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Is summer vacation over yet? When does school start?

    Donkey
     

    Dear Donkey,

    Summer is over on September 21st according to the calendar. However, as my trusty secretary will tell you, until she starts sleeping in socks, it is still summer regardless of what the calendar says. School starts at 7:15 in the morning, so don't be late!

    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Should I put "Hello Kitty" stickers on the catalytic converters? What about mufflers?

    Your Favorite,
    Spazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
     
    Dear Spazzzzzzzzzzzzzz,
     
    No.  If you put stickers on the catalytic converter, it will get fur all over the stickers and the cat will not be happy, then you won't be able to convert it to anything because it will be much too angry about the stickers.  Mufflers, you could put stickers on those, but I think the cold air and the wrapping around your neck part would make the stickers not stick so well. Plus, mufflers that are hand knitted out of wool are extra warm and you can knit in the designs instead of using stickers.  I hope you know most people call them scarves and not mufflers.  However, you can call them mufflers if you want.  I understand what you mean and that is all that really matters anyway.

    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    @donkey_guy_10 is this week's winner!

    For beating @DingDongDingBat at Scrabble and Words with Friends.

    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening.

    "Aye, so I have. 'Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. And then there was something called "Happy Hour" and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o' those. Then I had to drive me friend Mike home and O' course I had to go in for a couple of Guinness - couldn't be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later .." And the man fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection.

    The officer sighed, and said, "Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyzer test."

    Indignantly, the man said, "Why? Don't ye believe me?!".


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Vince Jones - Don't Worry About a Thing


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

September 9, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 9-9-2012

    DonkeyTimesBanner

    Saturday Night Fever: Dancing Polar Bear Struts His Stuff Like John Travolta

    September 2, 2012

    This disco dancing polar bear appears to have caught a little Saturday Night Fever having been snapped throwing a series of shapes in the Arctic Circle.

    The fluffy white bear was caught on camera jumping and jiving in the middle of the wilderness on the edge of Bernard Spit in Alaska.

    With temperatures plummeting well below zero throughout most of the year it appears as if one of the world's largest land carnivores is dancing in a bid to keep warm.

    The boogying bear's hip-shaking moves and outstretched paws evoke memories of John Travolta in 1977 classic disco film Saturday Night Fever.

    Professional photographer Steven Kazlowski, who specialises in capturing polar bears in the wild, managed to catch the stunning pictures of the animal in action earlier this year.

    While the bear might look like a natural on the dance floor, his nifty footwork was actually down to a genuine lack of co-ordination.

    'This curious and overexcited young bear was trying to get a better look at us as we passed on the skiff,' explained Kazlowski. 'It was trying very hard to stand up and keep its balance.'

    'Young bears are always trying to stand and get a better look at what is around them, as their mothers do, but are incredibly unbalanced.'

    For the original article, go here.


    Miracle Cat Who Survived Three-Week Ocean Voyage Finds New Home

    September 3, 2012

    A stowaway cat that beat the odds by surviving a three-week ocean voyage from China to California has found a new home.

    The resilient kitty, which has been named Ni Hao, or Hello, endured a gruelling 6,500-mile journey without any food or water after becoming trapped in a storage container on a shipping boat.

    He was found on 'death's door' by Los Angeles county animal control officials before being rushed to a local pet refuge.

    Ni Hao has since made an astonishing recovery and will start a new life next week with a family in the LA suburb of Redondo Beach.

    'He was curled up in a ball with his eyes shut… and he actually appeared deceased,' explained animal control official Aaron Reyes.

    He added: 'He's gone from this shrivelled up little kitten with shallow breathing and knocking on death's door to this curious, playful, bouncy, affectionate, patient, little furry kitty.'

    County shelter workers speculate that Ni Hao was able to survive by eating or drinking something just before wandering into the container or because 'he is so young his resilience is off the charts'.

    Despite suffering considerable muscle atrophy on the journey, Ni Hao's only lingering sign of trauma is a limp, which Reyes describes as 'his own strut.'

    For the original article, go here.


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    Midas! That has something to do with gold, right?

    The jackpot - sexy sisters!


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    What's a helix? Someone said my DNA had a double helix, but my phone chord only has a single helix! I guess its on DND? Maybe you know!

    Geometrically Challenged
     
    Dear Geometrically Challenged,
     
    Helix is the Hispanic cousin of Felix.   They don't like to use phones but they do enjoy ladders and circus events.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why is Spazzz your favorite?

    Not Spazzz
     
    Dear Not Spazzz,
     
    She is my favorite because that is how she described herself.  Plus she thinks I am funny in addition to knowing all the answers to stuff.  BUT, do not despair, I like you too.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


     


    FoolOfTheWeek

    @seedsower is this week's winner!

    Beach! Beach! Beach!

    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Q: How do you know when a Texas Aggie has been making chocolate chip cookies?
    A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

    Q: What job function does a Texas Aggie have in an M&M factory?
    A: Proofreading.

    Q: Do you know why the Texas Aggie got fired from the M&M factory?
    A: For throwing out the W's.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    John Sebastian - She's a Lady


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have any questions for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

September 8, 2012

  • Carthage Jail - Site of a Pivotal Event in the History of Mormonism

    Well

    Carthage Jail on Wikipedia

    In 2006, this wikipedia article said this:

    Carthage Jail, located in Carthage, Illinois, was the location of the martyrdom of Joseph Smith, Jr. and his brother Hyrum by a mob of approximately 150 men. Friends John Taylor and Willard Richards were also members of the incarcerated party, but were not killed. The group had reported to Carthage, the county seat, to face charges brought against Joseph. On June 27, 1844, a mob stormed the upper room of the prison and killed Joseph and Hyrum. John Taylor was badly wounded and Willard Richards was scathed, but not injured.

    The jail was built in 1839. Constructed of native red limestone, the two-story rectangular gable-front building measures twenty-nine by thirty-five feet. Like other county jails in Illinois, Carthage Jail was built to incarcerate petty thieves and debtors and to serve as a temporary holding place for violent criminals. It housed a debtor's room in the northwest corner of the first floor, and a dungeon, or "criminal cell" on the second floor, north side. There was also a living area for the jailer's family that included a kitchen, a dining room, and bedrooms.

    Now, in 2012, the article reads like this:

    Carthage Jail, located in Carthage, Illinois, was the location of the death of Joseph Smith, Jr., the founder of the Latter Day Saint movement, and his brother Hyrum by a mob of approximately 150 men. Friends John Taylor and Willard Richards were also members of the incarcerated party, but were not killed. The group had reported to Carthage, the county seat, to face charges brought against Joseph. On June 27, 1844, a mob stormed the upper room of the prison and killed Joseph and Hyrum. John Taylor was badly wounded and Willard Richards was scathed, but not injured.

    The jail was built in 1839. Constructed of native Muncie creek shale, the two-story, rectangular, gable-front building measures twenty-nine by thirty-five feet. Like other county jails in Illinois, Carthage Jail was built to incarcerate petty thieves and debtors and to serve as a temporary holding place for violent criminals. It housed a debtor's room in the northwest corner of the first floor, and a dungeon, or "criminal cell" on the second floor, north side. There was also a living area for the jailer's family that included a kitchen, a dining room, and bedrooms.

    Controversy still surrounds the facts leading up to the killing of Joseph Smith. Joseph Smith is the founder of Mormonism. Here is a link to Mormonism on wikipedia. If your look at the history of this article, you can see it is subject to constant revisions - and no doubt some controversy.

    No, I am not Mormon - although a few of my ancestors were. Much history of the Carthage Jail is told by the Mormons, but there are also other versions. Since I was not there, I can not attest to the accuracy of those renderings of history, but I can tell you what I know and believe today.

    I looked at length for this older picture (above) of the Carthage Jail. Notice the uneven shrubs along the side of the building, and the unraked lawn. Carthage is by no means an unkempt town, but this picture is typical of the way many older buildings and dwellings are kept in Carthage. Notice also the well. Now lets look at some more recent pictures.

    well2

    Notice how all the untidy shrubbery has been removed - and the perfectly manicured lawn.

    well3

    Notice the changes in the well, and the artificial stone all around the building.

    This building looks very much more like the carefully tended buildings in Navou than a building typical of Carthage. Someone has been manicuring the grounds and building. This is not the way a debtors jail would be maintained in a small farm town in the 1800's. Its too neat. It is good, though, that this historical site is be well taken care of.

    In the mid 1920's the Carthage Jail was used as a residence. History states that the Mormons owned the Jail during that time, but my mother swears that her uncle owned the jail during the 1920s. Whether he owned the jail or rented it as a residence I do not know, but I do believe my mother's uncle lived in the building as his residence during the 1920s. My Grandfather confirmed as much to me when he was alive. As a child, my mother played in the room where Joseph Smith was shot. During the 1960's I went to the jail many times. And these stories were repeated to me by by mother, my grandfather, my grandmother, and great aunts and uncles.

    JailDoor

    I remember distinctly this door and the bullet hole. Another thing I recall, was a framed plate of glass on the floor of one of the rooms purported to cover a blood stain made by the blood of Joseph Smith. That plate of glass is no longer there. Both my mother and grandfather told me the story of how my mother's uncle would periodically take up the plate of glass, and pour red ink over the stain whenever the stain began to fade.

    Cell

    Like the shrubs and the well, these bits of history concerning the Carthage Jail have been neatly manicured away. What else has been "manicured" away - or neatly pasted in place? I do not know! But I love a mystery!


    jailjoke 

    ronald_jail

    Ronald goes to jail!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht

    Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    • IN PRISON...You spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell.
    • AT WORK....You spend most of your time in a 6x8 cubicle.
    • IN PRISON...You get three meals a day.
    • AT WORK....You only get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it.
    • IN PRISON...You get time off for good behavior.
    • AT WORK....You get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
    • IN PRISON...A guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
    • AT WORK....You must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
    • IN PRISON...You can watch TV and play games.
    • AT WORK....You get fired for watching TV and playing games.
    • IN PRISON...You get your own toilet.
    • AT WORK....You have to share.

    Do you have any family stories that contradict recorded history? Do you think the history books are always accurate?

September 2, 2012

  • The Sunday Monkey Times Rerun 9-2-2012

    Cop Investigated for Feeding Gorillas Pop-Tarts

    August 26, 2009

    A police officer in America is under investigation over allegations that last year he snuck into a zoo after hours to feed gorillas Pop-Tarts.

    The police officer, who hasn't been identified, was reportedly one of a larger group of people let into Como Zoo in St. Paul, Minneapolis, by two security guards at around 2 a.m. one day last January.

    Surveillance cameras caught the officer apparently then trying to feed the snacks to the gorillas, who are named Schroeder, Gordy and Togo. The zoo says that Pop-Tarts are not part of a gorilla's diet.

    The zoo says they don't know if the gorillas actually ate the Pop-Tarts, but that the animals do not appear to have suffered any ill-effects from the experience.

    For the original article, go here.


    Police Arrest Monkey

    August 26, 2009

    Australian police arrested a man dressed as a monkey, provoking the ire of a crowd of onlookers.

    The man in the monkey suit, Brenton Green, was carted off to jail after spending Sunday afternoon dancing around Perth, hugging people and posing for photos. He spent that night in cutody.

    The incident began when police interrupted Green's show in front of a small crowd, and demanded his name. At first, the monkey responded just by shaking his head and making odd sounds; when asked for his name again, he simply said 'Monkey'.

    At that point, the officers pushed him against a shop window and handcuffed him, as onlookers laughed and booed. 'Why are they arresting this monkey?' cried one onlooker.

    Police said Green had been spotted by officers bumping into people, and allegedly had knocked a hamburger out of a man's hands. They said that he then refused to give them his name, instead 'continually shaking his head and making squeaking noises'.

    He was taken to jail, where is he was bailed on the condition that he not return to the city. But as he walked to the train station, the same officer then re-arrested him, on the grounds that he'd breached the bail conditions. He was then held overnight.

    'I thought it was some sort of a joke. And then he put the cuffs on me and I just couldn't believe it,' Green told PerthNow.

    He appeared in Perth Magistrates Court on Monday, charged with 'failing to comply with a request given'. He was given a three-month community release order and ordered to pay $60 in court costs.

    For the original article, go here.


    Editorial Comment: I think this guy was a chimposter!

    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2



    Dear Miss Monkey Pants,

    Why would a police officer try to feed a gorilla a pop-tart?

    Eggs For Breakfast
     
    Dear Eggs for Breakfast,
     
    I am sure that it is because the police officer has a daughter that used to look up to someone.... oh like Britney Spears,  and he is only protecting his own daughter from becoming a pop tart.  I've wanted to feed a few pop tarts to gorillas, but I don't have a zoo pass.
     
    Miss Monkey Pants


    Dear Miss Monkey Pants,

    Is it watermelon season yet? Where does one go to hunt watermelons? Do you need a license to hunt watermelons? Is there a limit to how many watermelons you can bag in a season?

    To Dry to Spit in Austin
     
    Dear Dried Spit,
     
    Yes. Either markets or fields.  Yes, drivers.  Depends on paper or plastic or recycled.  And if you spit the seeds and one falls in your belly button.. a plant will grow.  My mother used to tell me that as I child, so you know it is gospel truth.
     
    Miss Monkey Pants


    Flash is this week's winner!

    Something about painting herself into a corner?


    Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Monkey on the Beat, signing off until ???


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    The Beatles - Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Any questions for Miss Monkey Pants? Report it to the Monkey!

September 1, 2012

  • The Problem With Pronouns!


    There is a problem that sometimes occurs with the use of pronouns.

    Some people heard the above.

    Others heard this!

    This is fascinating! Some people seem absolutely certain what was really meant!

    I am reminded of a Bertrand Russell quote:

    “One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid,
    and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision.”

    *Edit*

    I am also reminded of lyrics from the Simon and Garfunkel song, "The Boxer":

    "Still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest."

    This really seems more about what people want to hear!

    Fascinating!

August 25, 2012

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 8-26-2012 - Rerun

    DonkeyTimesBanner

    Koala Bear Gets Trapped in Car's Grill - and Lives

    August 20, 2010

    This koala had a lucky escape after it somehow survived being struck by a car travelling at 50mph and getting caught in the car's grill.

    The bear got wedged in the Ford Falcon’s grill and had to be carefully driven 15km (nine miles) to a vet in Portland, Australia, to be extracted.

    Local vet Lisia Sturm was astounded to find the koala had survived without a scratch, after it was cut from the grill with bolt cutters.

    The animal was kept under observation for the rest of the day before being released back into its natural habitat later that afternoon.

    For this original article, go here.


    Man Flashes While Dressed as a Banana, Brandishes Shotgun

    August 20, 2010

    A man was arrested for exposing himself and waving a shotgun around – while dressed as a banana. His plan to split before he was nabbed didn’t bear fruit.

    Police in Port Angeles, Washington state, were first alerted to the unappeeling antics when reports came in from diners at a restaurant that a man in a costume was exposing himself.

    He was also seen exposing himself and waving a gun around while careering through the city with friends in a car.

    Clallam County officers arrested the 21-year-old for indecent exposure and reckless endangerment.

    However, the suspect failed to explain why he was dressed as a potassium-rich yellow fruit (see picture).

    His costume was confiscated and bagged as evidence.

    There are unconfirmed reports that a Port Angeles police psychiatrist thinks the suspect may have committed the alleged crimes because he'd 'gone bananas'.

    For this original article, go here.


    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    Tude fell asleep in bed with chocolate...

    And woke up to find she had been rolling around in it!

    Spazzz has her chocolate for breakfast!

    All gone!



    Seedsower found some donkeys!



    DonkeyTimesLifeStyleBanner2

    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Have you ever had amnesia and de-javu at the same time?

    Trying to Remember
     
    Dear Trying to Remember,
     
    No.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    Why does Tude roll around in chocolate in her sleep?

    Donkey
     
    Dear Donkey,
     
    Tude is dreaming of being in heaven.  It's just good practice, you should try it sometime.
     
    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    Seedsower and Tude tied for Fool of the Week!

    Seedsower for having a birthday, and Tude for rolling around in chocolate!


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten teargas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them, shouting out to give himself up.

    Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a line-up. When detectives asked each man in the line-up to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I'll shoot", the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

    In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun but unfortunately he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    The Monkees - I'm a Believer


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

August 18, 2012

August 12, 2012