September 27, 2009

  • The Sunday Donkey Times 09-27-2009

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    Cops Taser, Handcuff Rogue Emu

    September 22, 2009

    An emu that clearly loved life in the fast lane caused havoc when it ran along a busy US highway. Police originally received calls from startled motorists who had spotted two of the bird-brained, er, birds hot-footing it around the state's I20 motorway and Highway 80 road.

    It took officers two days of searching before they found one of the traffic-dodging creatures near an entrance to the I-20 carriageway.

    The speedy animal was eventually surrounded by the authorities, who used a taser gun to subdue it before moving it out of harm's way.

    The emu is being kept at the Scott County Forest Coliseum sanctuary, presumably while police decide whether to charge the bird with Jay walking.

    For the original article, go here.


    Judge Exiles Dog

    September 25, 2009

    A Pomeranian dog has been banished by a judge from the Colorado resort of Aspen after getting in trouble for biting and other bad behaviour.

    Municipal Judge Brooke Peterson told the dog's owner, Melinda Goldrich, that if the dog is seen again in Aspen, it will be rounded up by animal control officers and put to death. Goldrich was in court on Wednesday on a charge of keeping a vicious dog.

    An Aspen fitness club employee told The Aspen Times that the Pomeranian, named Gizmo, bit her in August while it was tied to a fence. The dog served 10 days in an animal shelter.

    Goldrich had been under a court order to not leave Gizmo unattended after the dog bit another person in February. She also was cited in 2006 for the animal's bad behavior.

    An out-of-town friend has offered to take the dog, it is reported.

    Pomeranians are long-haired and small, typically 3 to 7 pounds (1.5 to 3 kilograms).

    For the original article, go here.


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    You have heard of tube socks? Well - these are Tude socks!



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    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    A fool in training and his pack of fools from school want to know what people from Oklahoma are called. You know New Yorkers are from New York, Texans are from Texas. So are they Okls, Oklies, Oklahomanians, Oklahomos? Or what?

    Thankee

    Dear Fool in Training and your posse pals,

    If you are the governor of Oklahoma, you call your constiutuants Oklahomans. If you are just a regular person that lives in Oklahama, you call yourself and all your neighbors Okies. If you happen to live in Muscogee, you are an Okie from Muscogee. If you live in New York, you call them "southerners".

    Miss Smarty Pants


    MissSmartyPantsDear Miss Smarty Pants,

    How did Dingdongdingbat get inside my cell phone¿ how do i get her out¿
    Your favorite,

    Spazzzzzzzzzz

    Dear Spazz,

    I would forward her to Tude's phone so at least she is at home. She can't even breathe in your phone because she is underwater. Forward the fishies to a bowl and that should solve your problems.

    Miss Smarty Pants


    FoolOfTheWeek

    Aloysius_son is this week's winner!

    He swallowed a bee and it stung his innards!


    DonkeyNewsProfile Well, that's the way it was!

    Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!


    cooked_turkey_walking_md_wht Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day

    Why was the mommy horse upset with her son the mule?

    Because he came out half-assed.


    YouTube Today's YouTube Tune

    Let's Try This Again - Sara Gazarek


    Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

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