June 23, 2013

• The Sunday Donkey Times - Rerun

  
  

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  Rabbit-Obsessed Lady Arrested Over Rabbit Possession June 18, 2009 A woman obsessed with rabbits, known as the 'Bunny Lady', has been arrested after violating a court order that banned her from going within 100 yards of a rabbit. Authorities were alerted on Tuesday, after an employee at a hotel in Portland, Oregon reported finding 16 rabbits in Miriam Sakewitz's room. In April 2007, Sakewitz was sentenced to five years probation and given a court order banning her from owning any animals, or getting close to a rabbit. This followed from an incident in October 2006, when authorities confiscated almost 250 rabbits from her home in Hillsboro, Oregon - including around 100 dead bunnies, stored in freezers and refrigerators. In January 2007, Sakewitz broke into the facility where the rescued rabbits were being cared for, and stole most of them back. She was arrested a few das later with eight live rabbits and two dead ones in her car. Sakewitz spent a few days in jail later in the summer of 2007 after she was found in possession of a single rabbit. A subsequent check on her house failed to uncover any further rabbits, but did find a half-empty 10lb bag of carrots. On Tuesday, animal control officers removed eight adult rabbits, five young rabbits, and one dead rabbit from Sakewitz's hotel room. She was returned to custody, and faces animal neglect charges. For the original article, go here.

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  Swiss Cows Fight To Be Queen June 14, 2009 Furie and Cigale eye each other warily, take a step forward and lock horns. It's an ancient ritual, one that plays out each summer high in the Swiss Alps, as cows battle to be queen and villagers come to watch. Judges record every fight as spectators sit on the surrounding mountainside, sipping local wines and cheering their family herd. But it is the cows who choose who to fight and who will reign supreme at the end of the season. "They've been doing this ever since my grandparents were young, and even before that," says Marthe Vianin, once the proud owner of several fighting cows. "It's hundreds of years old." Vianin, in her sixties, has come to watch her son's two cows — Tzardon and Bamby — take on champions from other herds. Down in the corral, Bergamote faces off a challenge from Berkane with a fierce stare and a tussle of horns. No harm done. Still, there are clearly some seasoned fighters in this contest, judging from the scars they bear from past battles. Locals insist the bovine power-struggle is both humane and irrepressible. "It's very rare for them to hurt themselves," says Vianin. The fighting season starts in early June, when cows are taken up to pastures 9,000-feet (2,700-meters) high and encounter rival herds. What follows are a hundred days of grazing on lush Alpine meadows — and lots of fighting. Black, with short legs and built more like bulls than cows, the Herens breed found in the southern canton (state) of Valais is naturally competitive and will always establish their own hierarchy. Natural leaders distinguish themselves in battle, where strength and determination are key. In the fall, the herds' return to the valley is marked by a celebration. Owners decorate their cows with flowers and giant bells and they parade through the village, led, of course, by the queen. "It's a beautiful thing to see," says Trisha Cochrane from London, who owns a vacation home in the village of Grimentz. There is no prize money for the winner, but owners can fetch a handsome price — up to $30,000 (euro21,000) — if they choose to sell a queen. Most important, says local Albert Salamin, is the respect. The winner's owner is "king of the village for the year. He's more respected than the mayor," Salamin says to laughs from bystanders. The Salamin brothers have several cows in competition, but Albert admits only his brother Armand's prize heifer Bolero stands a real chance this year. Cow fighting is still taken seriously, but it's largely a hobby and a cherished tradition for most villagers, who have long since stopped living off the land. Four-wheel drive cars and all-year tourism have changed life in these remote Alpine valleys, bringing prosperity and making cattle-rearing less appealing to a younger generation. "Even 40 years ago, most families got much of what they needed from three or four cows," says Salamin. "Milk, cheese, meat, the cows provided it all." For the original article, go here.

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  Look Alikes From Spazzz:

  

  

  

  

  
  Oh! Yeah!

  Aloysius_son sent in a letter to the editor:

  

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  Dear Miss Smarty Pants, Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? Nocturnal Ninny Dear Nocturnal Ninny,   It is simply called "after dark" because that sounds more mysterious and slightly romantic.  Everyone knows that a little mystery and romance is a good thing!   Miss Smarty Pants

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  Dear Miss Smarty Pants, Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a gun at him? Rerun Watcher Rerun Watcher,   Superman was a bit dramatic.  He had trouble getting himself dressed in such a hurry in the phone booth.  I noticed he never got his underwear on before his tights.  I'm sure that was terribly embarrassing for him.  I think he ducked for the gun toss to distract everyone from his underwear on the outside.   Pretty smart in my opinion.  Create a diversion and distract everyone from the wardrobe malfunction.   Miss Smarty Pants

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  Flash is this week's winner!

  Something about her birthday this past week!
  

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  Well, that's the way it was! Your Donkey on the Beat, signing off until next week!

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  Dead Turkey Jokes of the Day An American man, a Russian man, and an African man were all up in a hot-air balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through the clouds. "Aaah!" he said. "We're right over my homeland." "How can you tell?" asked the American. "I can feel the cold air." he replied. A few hours later the African man put his hand through the clouds. "Aah we're right over my homeland." he said. "How do you know that?" asked the Russian. "I can feel the heat of the desert." Several more hours later the American put his hand through the clouds. "Aah, we're right over New York." The Russian and the African were amazed. "How do you know all of that?" they exclaimed. The American pulled his hand up. "My watch is missing."

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  Today's YouTube Tune Sara Gazarek sings I'm Old Fashioned

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  Did you see an interesting news article this past week? Do you have a question for Miss Smarty Pants? Report it to the Donkey!

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